Monday, June 9, 2008

News FLASH, B*@^#)$!!!!!

"Umm... my waiter seems tired, and he didn't iron his sleeves.

Does he live in a car?"

"No sir... he just likes camping a lot!"

News flash bitches: No more being homeless.

That's right. I got me a m-effing apartment. 500 plus something or other square feet. Only $535 a month. I got some windows and some floor. I can take a shower WHENEVER I WANT! I can keep food in a FRIDGE and not always have to buy ice that leaks onto where I sleep when the cheap wall mart cooler turns over. I can COOK without tasting pine sap! There are no COYOTES prowling around when I SLEEP- which I can do WHENEVER I WANT- whether or not it is day or night, and without having to drive far away! NEITHER are their ROOMATES- which, like biting insects AND coyotes, I no longer FOR THE NEXT YEAR AT LEAST will have to fucking deal with, chase down for rent, or clean up after.

This means YOU: Matt and Andrew I repainted all that shit you vandalized you bastards

And YOU: R Lindsey- I had my security deposit mangled over more that it should have been because you didn't take out your furniture like you promised to do.

Thanks a lot, champ!

I got a SHOWER CURTAIN with rubber ducks on it it is BLUE I really like it. There's also a DRYING RACK I can put dishes in so they DRY at their own leisure. I don't have to wash DIRT out of my plates before I eat off them.

Also, I have a TOILET I can use without having to buy something first!

I have a desk, and the internet. I have walls I can put maps onto and space for a bookcase to put this pile of books onto.

I thought the outdoors here and politics would keep me busy enough but I've found another thing to do: Go to K-Mart and buy HOUSEWARES for my HOME that I LIVE IN and have MY NAME on A LEASE AT!

The floor above me has better views of the rockies BUT it is hot up there and colder in the basement so I like my middle floor. My neighbors are also all very friendly and they all play music loud so that makes me feel good.

OH yes- and umm... PLENTY OF FREE ON THE STREET PARKING and NO hunting like a WILD ELK for that shit at 2 am because SOMEONE decided to put a lot of fucking clubs and other gentrified crap by my last apartment!

Studio is being set up and I can finally finish that album I was muttering about around a month ago before the presence of a beautiful woman made it impossible. I need to get some isopropyl first though and wipe everything down there is some dust you know from umm... me accidentally knocking out the back windshield while on a dirt road but HEY what doesn't kill you makes you STRONGER right?

At this point in Time I would like to thank:

-Danielle, Jim, and Heith for putting me up at their places for a while or letting me sit their cats/stay at their place/eat their food for a while.
-Jim and Juan and Danielle and my work for giving me good apartment company references.
-The National Forest Service and the Bureau of Land Management for maintaining our public lands.
-The friendly and competent staff of Hooked on Coalfax, Penn Street Perk, Leela's, Cafe Netherworld, and Burger King.
-My Dad for teaching me how to live in the woods and cook out and pitch tents and wear layers and such.
-Whoever bought me drinks last night at the Church when I was celebrating

Also, it is very important that if you live in Denver and

-have ever changed oil & oil filter on a '99 or equivalent Subaru Forester and would like to show me how to do that


-You have a bookcase, or a dresser, or a table, or a desk chair, or some other such pieces of furniture you do not want to keep in your possession


You contact me and let me know of this!

SEE YA LATER!!!!!!!!!!


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